By Anna McDonald, Director of Family Learning
Teaching children charitable behavior is essential for instilling compassion, empathy, and social responsibility. With intentional practices, parents and caregivers can cultivate a mindset of giving and service in their children and grandchildren. This practice also creates good stewards of the family’s legacy.
Charitable parents tend to raise charitable children. Parental modeling plays a crucial role in young children’s development, especially in shaping their values and behaviors related to charity and empathy. When parents demonstrate and discuss charitable behavior, children are likely to mimic these actions, internalizing the values they embody.
This is because children learn values through observations and witnessing how their parents and other meaningful adults treat others. The core development throughout childhood and teenage years that parents model is understanding the impacts of our actions on others. Listening respectfully to their coach — or adopting, without tantrums, the family schedule for the weekend — are simple ways that children will absorb that their behavior impacts others around them. Children learn through observation, so witnessing the adults in their lives who donate time, money, or other needed resources fosters a practical understanding of philanthropy. Likewise, it’s important for adults to make mention of the reasons why it matters to your family to be generous. Open dialogue about the motivations behind your service or giving can further reinforce these lessons. Use your own choice of words to share that your family is lucky, or blessed, or grateful, to be in a position to be charitable.
Start Early
Introducing the concept of charity at a young age is crucial. It’s important to move beyond talking about what the family is giving in terms of dollars and involve children in simple acts of care for others. Delivering a welcome gift to a new neighbor and including children in the preparation and drop off process are a great way for them to learn that simple acts of love and kindness can make an impact. Many non-profits offer volunteer opportunities for young children; however, starting early doesn’t mean you have to travel far to engage in acts of service. At this stage, how your family relates and tends to your immediate community circles may mean just as much as any formal volunteering opportunity.
Adolescence: Allocate a Budget to Each Child for Giving Purposes
Creating a budget specifically for each child’s charitable donations is an effective way to teach financial responsibility and good stewardship principles to adolescents. This practice empowers children to choose where to allocate small amounts of money, fostering a sense of ownership and decision-making in their philanthropic journey. As children reach adolescence, asking and listening to them about what they want their role to be in the family’s overall charitable goals is a great way for them to understand they have ownership and agency, as well as a seat at the family table for how giving decisions are made. The focus here is on value creation, not necessarily on the amount of financial assets or the specific funding vehicle that is being used to give to charity.
Establish a Birthday Eve Dinner
From 3-year-olds to young adults, families can establish a Birthday Eve Dinner celebration. Every year, the night before a child’s birthday, a special family dinner can provide an opportunity to talk about what being one-year older means for the child.
Discuss together what one responsibility and one new privilege the child would like to add to their lives now that they are a year older. For example, even a 3-year-old can have the responsibility of putting away their stuffed animals each day as a task to learn to care for their things, and a privilege they could add would be choosing the bedtime story, picking what movie to watch, or choosing the park at which to play, or a special activity of the week. This practice can be established at any point in a child’s or a young adult’s life. How does a Birthday Eve dinner help raise a charitable child? They are learning that values form the basis of who you are, and a key to loving others around them and doing good in the world.
There are lots of other great examples of ways to incorporate charitable acts into everyday tasks without burdening the agenda. Head to the bookstore and let children pick a new book for themselves, and an additional favorite title to donate to a literacy charity or a neighborhood tiny library. While apple picking, encourage the children to gather an extra bushel of fruit to donate to the nearest food pantry.
By incorporating these types of practices, families can instill a lifelong commitment to philanthropy in their children. Modeling charitable behavior, encouraging participation, and fostering open dialogue about giving will help raise a generation of compassionate individuals who understand the value of looking beyond themselves to make a positive impact on the world.
Moneta’s wealth managers can help you explore ways to incorporate philanthropic practices into your family’s activities. Reach out to your Moneta advisor for a conversation about raising charitable children.
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